Breakthrough in Iraq War

Satire

After many years of progress and the worthwhile time spent in Iraq, former president George W. Bush’s goal has been realized. We have finally found oil buried underneath over one million acres of land. According to the oil drilling companies owned by the former president Bush had this to say, “We did it, it took the sacrifice of thousands of soldiers and billions of dollars but now we can sleep in peace”. When asked about how the rest of the world would see the U. S. since the original purpose was to obtain weapons of mass destruction from Saddam Hussein, Bush had this to say, “It doesn’t matter what they think because first of all I won’t be able to understand them because I don’t speak Asian, European, or Mexican. And second of all it’s all about the Benjamin’s baby”. It is to be expected that the Iraq’s will not interrupt our oil drilling since our initial intention was to find oil and not to slay the people of Iraq. All over the world people who own Hummers and Escalades are rejoicing over this new found oil site. “There should be enough oil to generate two more years of gasoline to run our gas guzzling yet necessary v10 engine trucks”, says the cabinet of Bush’s administration. All over the U. S. people are showing their expression of relief and happiness over this newfound oil that they are all speechless and shocked with their jaws dropped to the ground. Of course George W. Bush will be using all the proceeds to help rejuvenate the broken down economy and put less of the profits into his overfilled wallet. “I will help this country recover from this economic crisis even though I did not cause it”, said George W. Bush.

Alex Huang